Saturday, October 18, 2014

FML

F*** my life :D

It's pretty dull right now, but don't worry! I'm in the process of fixing it.

Hmm... let's see. According to Schwarzenegger, there are the following six rules to keep in mind:


  1. Trust yourself
  2. Break some Rules
  3. Don't be afraid to fail
  4. Ignore the Naysayers
  5. Work like Hell
  6. Give something back
Which is probably why he always used to say "I'm back" in his movies... anyway...

First off, Status check:
  • I study Maths, Further Maths, Physics and Computer Science at Sixth Form (yeah, England)
  • I speak three languages + some French, and know plenty of computer languages. 
  • I take tons of online courses from coursera.org, udacity.com, and edx.org so I know way more than your average student. 
  • I have a Black belt in Karate and origami... but I've lost some of my skill over the years.
  • I'm okay at Poetry and writing. Not to show off, but I turned up at a Poetry Club for English students and was favoured above all of them by the Teacher. 
  • I spend most of my time at home. If I do decide to go outside, I end up walking along deserted roads and wondering how awesome it would be to have friends outside of school.
  • My only close friend is a mute. He never talks and we're both nerd though most people confess that we don't look like that at all. Plus, it's impossible for me to speak to girls.. literally. My chosen subjects are all technical and no girls can be found in a ten mile radius of me. 
  • Sad thing is, I have a huge crush on one girl, at my sixth form... but I also fancy another female at another school that I go to (she's in my computing class). The first one doesn't know me at all and the other one things I'm a legend at computing but probably that I'm a nerd as well. 
  • I have a clearly observable split personality disorder. Yes... many people have told me this. I seem incredible stressed in certain situations, and awesome at others. I've found out that I'm pretty cool when there is a certain thing to focus on. But if I'm, say, at a canteen I tend to fiddle and be nervous because there isn't a specific problem to solve.
Now I know what I'm like right now... time to apply Arnold's rulez:

Trust myself. I honestly don't know who I am at the moment. So the best way I think I can achieve this is through self-reflection... i.e. I will start meditating. I've wanted to make this a habit for a while, but my brain is never quiet. Time to make it so! Secondly, I want to take this cool online course on Dante's Divine comedy because it apparently addresses the question of Who am I? Now believe me when I say I've taken a ton of online courses so far. The problem is, those were all technical. This one's going to be different. 
Break some Rules and don't be afraid to fail. To be honest, the only reason I don't approach that girl is because I'm scared of what other people will think; I have had a strict German upbringing. I also fear rejection... but I do know how to communicate with girls. I've read a ton of pick-up books and know the theory. I just need to get over fear of failure and fear of judgement. But you know what brain?! My life is finite, I will regret missed opportunities more than mistakes. IDGAF about what others will think. I'm just going to approach and get it over and done with because I've had this fucking crush for over two years now!

Ignore the Naysayers and work like hell. I want to be successful and go down in history as an awesome guy (hopefully this blog will be left out of the media content). My current goal is getting into the cambridge maths undergraduate masters programme. So I am making this promise that I will work incredibly hard to get a sexy set of A-Level results and study for the STEP exam. Money is also a problem, so I will have to implement my money making strategy (I've thought it out well but have yet to use it).


Give something back. I'm already doing this by giving my help to German Lessons at my school... but I think I need to do more so I'm going to write a set of e-books teaching people all the skillz I have picked up across my years of intense study. 

Honestly... if only I could get a job in infield leaflet distribution, as in handing out leaflets to people in public places. I'd be so epic at it. I would make the charity/company RICH... YES, I will do that too. But not now, because I'm not prioritising it. 

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